when it ends and the feeling of disappointment is greater than the feeling of heartbreak you know it wasn’t meant to be.
still disappointment hurts. respect and dignity are real human needs. and when stripped of those from the one you admire it tends to resemble heartbreak.
staying true to my heart! She is still untouched and thus unbroken. the pride however…. like a hail storm just came through.
In this day of giving thanks for all of our blessing, misfortunes and lessons learned I have reflected a bit on the past year.
To say I have grown and learned is an understatement. From men to finances I have gone through the ringer with them all. Out of all the WTF and the “Transaction Not Approved” moments I have learned, grown and despite some of the most dim moments I still believed I could do more, be more, have more, share more, care more, and love more.
And more than the growing and learning is the CHANGE I see in it all. I am witnessing my own rebound from the negative, the idle life, the complacency of it all.
MOVEMENT FORWARD.
it is so exciting to see my life progress in the direction I have imagined. From vision board to reality, one-step-at-a-time.
Life can be faster than you know what to think and sometimes it can be baby steps. To recognize the progression no matter the pace, this is key.
With all this gratefulness in my life today, I am going to appreciate my physical location with a trip to the beach.
Pacific Ocean + Ukulele = relaxing Turkey Day.
it’s time for a true confession.
I have never felt love, true, real, pure love will ever happen to me.
i hate to admit the sad truth. maybe that’s why i secretly sabotage anything close to me. maybe that’s why i mock it. maybe that’s why i hold the body pillow while i sleep and not an actual body.
i read about it. i hear about it. i watch about it. but i don’t feel it.
money seems easier to obtain than love.
i can put together a plan– put in TRUE effort and with X amount of effort i can get X amount of dollars. love doesn’t work that way. can’t make someone love you because you put in the effort.
money is linear. money is real. money is obtainable.
truth is: i have more money than love. and i don’t have much money.
